Monday, August 08, 2005

The hermit and the temptaion

(erotic statues, some temple in india. the way things should have been)

I recently finished the first year in visual communications (graphic design) studies in tel aviv, israel. i work in a little dubious studio that works mainly for small business, some of them are definitely from the "red" part of town (and by saying red, i don't meen commies) . as well as for other decent clients, we also design lousy sex sites and flash banners (advertisement in websites).
and im saying to myself - GOD! this is so filthy that it makes me nauseus.

i liked designing a sex site logo, that had at least a notion of designer respectfulness, but I'm really not keen of messing with that shit. it's not that I'm against sex - sex is awesome, sex is good for your health and it's burning calories. i don't want to sound like a hypocrite, but when i make a sex banner, it really stinks. it stinks because the customers are whore-houses owners. they are filthy monkeys and everything they do is dirty and the "make it cheep and fast" style.

when I'm in those business, even though i just design, i can really smell the stench that comes from these kind of jobs. it smells like semen and despair, and filthy places. the other problem is that some of the jobs come out REALLY shitty, because I'm suppose to fart as many of these banners in a day.

on the one hand i want to supply the demand, on the other - even if it's a sex banner - i want to learn something by experience. it's a part of the job, and it's money, and that's something. i always remind myself that all of my friends would never get a job as designers in the first year, (because they have no experience) and here i got a mildly respectable job as a designer. so i should appreciate that. and with the shitty things, as i said - comes many many wonderful stuff, like designing printed ads for big clients, and a big project - designing a brand new tourist newspaper (in English) so that's the art of compromise, i think. anyway - don't feel humiliated or harassed doing the sex banners, but i don't like it.
i think any experience is a lesson, and i also learned some things, from designing sex sites and banners.

but there's one thing that reeeeeally bothers me is this:
unless you are castrated, gay, or an alien (with all due respect to the alien public off course), this kind of work is hard for a straight man
i have to enter sex sites from abroad to download pictures to be used in banners (yea), and seeing all those sex images, young, hot and busty women in sexy poses not invented even by Satan himself, is making me superbly HORNY. it's like they are calling me -" f__k me! - I'm right here, hot and throbbing, damnit!". i get erections every two seconds, and i have to hide it with the keyboard XD (and in that term, girls are lucky. because when you are in the street in jeans [or worse - in soft cloth pants] and an erection starts, there's no where to run).
can you imagine 9 hours of work in this kind of situation, without the possibility of jerking-off in the toilet and letting it all out so i can be clear minded??? (the toilet [and the business] is in a private home, and is often dirtier than the latrines of medieval India).
how can i used my brain, when it's occupied with mating rituals??? why the hell i need to supress a natural need??
i feel like a monk in the playboy mansion.
this isn't human. i cant take it! XD

now that's a good tale to tell the folks near the cooler huh? :)


Blogger Ms. Mika said...

HAHAHAA! U r funny! I feel 4 ya, but not in the way you need! But all else aside it sounds like you're getting a lot of experience and that's the trade off! Good luck!

12:38 PM  
Blogger dark-forest said...

thank's mika :) yea i do get a lot of experience both menta
by the way - d'you know that in israel, is a short name for "michaela"?
(it's the female form of the Hebrew name Miyka'el which meant "who is like God?")

3:27 PM  

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