Tuesday, August 16, 2005

the Typo Presentation

I had a really bad dream that was mostly forgotten.
in the dream i went to the design school I'm studying in, to present my typography assignment for the end of the year.
the school in the dream lied inside an old industrial building (not far from the truth, but more filthy and deserted) in an industrial complex area in "har zion" avenue, near "shoken" street. the inside of the building was dark, old and full of filth, puddles and dust. the floor tiles were so filthy.
light had barely peeped through the broken shutters. i walked in and i was alone.
then - i found myself in a "classroom" which was a long and black corridor, which resembled to a theatre rehearsal room (with black painted walls) with a few naked light bulbs. i went up the corridor and i saw the other students. the atmosphere was like an art exhibition. people talked politely, steeling suspicious looks aside to see who's coming. i went to the end of the corridor and there was a very small room (actually more like an extension of the corridor because it was part of the corridor). it had white walls, low ceiling, naked light bulbs, and a wooden door colored in gray.
i met there a man that i know from my teen years (in real life) and is a moderately known design personality. he made it on his own, didn't learn design, and he is very nice. and i consult with him often. (further on the dream:) i greeted him and he gave me a polite greet, but then looked aside in a snobbish way and walked away, as though he's ashamed of me or thinks i am not good enough for him. i met some other class mates, including a friend and other female classmate i always was nice to and she was always snobbish and un-nice to me. they looked on the white wall. there were lied some of my classmates's works, that featured their logotypes (made in the typo class in real life). the atmosphere was tense and i was twice. i got my works out of the bag, and i saw my work was framed with a special wooden frame with extensions. the frame is very similar to a frame i know from real life, and reminds me of those ancient Japanese gates found in shrines. my mother bought for it to frame a Chinese calligraphy paper that my brother brought us from Australia. i like calligraphy and i like that frame, but anyway-
although the frame was special but un-needed, i found to my horror that the paper inside the frame, under a clear glass attaching it to the frame surface, was wrinkled, torn and old, and was placed there in a neglected way. my logotype was supposed to be printed there, clear black on a clean shiny paper attached to a kappa surface (a plastic foam surface that is used to present works on). the logotype there was supposed to be the finished one. but i saw stuff similar only to sketches, not a finished work. i went pale and got into anxiety. i was horrified.
and then, the typo teacher got in the room from that door.
this is all i can remember, or maybe it was the awful end of an awful dream.
i don't expect the readers here to truly understand the importance of typo class for me, or the whole crazy being that is me, but it was horrible.
currently I'm avoiding the temptation of the dream interpretation until i talk about it with my therapist.
I'm in a very depressing and hard time in my life. I'm tight and i made myself to postpone major test and presentations (of summer class i take in the open university to gain a degree aside from the design studies). it was me who created this situation, and thus i enlarge my self hatred.


Anonymous lilly said...

I'm sorry to inform you, they don't write that in the design schools year book or flyers, but studying design in Israel means that you are going to suffer from typo presentation nightmare for the rest of your life. The other things they don't tell you is that you are now doomed to design wedding invitation to anyone you know for free.

But anyway, I just had a pretty similar dream when I was sick last week, there was one day when my fever were starting to come down when I had really colorful and vivid dreams, which were very hazy and sort of surreal. So in a part of it I was barely holding a presentation of my final design school presentation, I was standing in front of the teacher, head of department and students and my throat (in the dream) hurt so badly I couldn't speak, the work I was presenting was a canvas painting that was basically stripes of ice blue, green ad purple, and as I was trying to present it, the painting took over everything, the wall became in similar colors, then my shirt then the teacher's outfits and then their faces till we all just disappeared in a ice blue, green and purple background.

I don't think you need a therapist to understand this dream, school's very stressful experience making you feel like you simply ain't good enough. That's just how they teach design, break your ego and patterns of thoughts and vision so you can be assimilate with new improved ones.

It'll get better, I was in your position and I just know, It's going to get better.

10:12 AM  
Blogger dark-forest said...

thanks, you always manage to cheer me up.
the therapist is for therapy, to make my life better. in our meetings we also interpret my dreams, and it's amazing what my subconcious has been telling me and i wasn't able to understand him.
i think the general depiction of the dream is far more shallow that what every symbol represents.

as one who care about typo and typo class so much, and stressed of it, i can definetly forsee a lot of misery, but i think that's the driver that makes me prove myself im worthy.
thanks for the "it will get better". it somewhat gives me hope. :)

12:37 PM  

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